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Steve Mitten's Life And Business Coaching Notes - May 2006

Dear Subscribers,

Happy Spring!!  I hope you are all thriving.

This month I have mixed it up a little. The first article contains a great story I think you'll enjoy. (It is the first guest piece I have ever included in this newsletter.)   

Personally, the return of longer, warmer, brighter days sees me drawn to the great outdoors. (Not that I hibernate, but inhabiting a northerly climate I do relish being outside more this time of year.)  

I'm also enjoying and learning a lot from two courses I am currently taking. The first is about Embodied Abundance, and it's offered by Master Somatic Coach and guest author Victoria Castle. It's a renewing, delightful somatic (body, mind, spirit) journey.  

The second course is on Martin Seligman's Positive Psychology, and I'm learning more about what modern science has to offer on the art and science of living the happy and meaningful life. 

I will have more to share with you on these learnings in the months ahead.



P.S. - This picture is of me on top of "Old Knob" a little mountain a short hike from our summer cabin on B.C.'s Sunshine Coast. (I could sit and take in the view from here for hours.)  


1) The Power of Confident, Unattached, Expectation: - Excerpt from Victoria Castle's The Trance of Scarcity.

2) Marketing: Assumptions, Optimal Growth and Accountability. 

3) The Science Based Coaching Model - Reactions.

4) This Month's Business Development For Coaches.

1) The Magical Power of Confident, Unattached, Expectation.  

The following story comes from Master Somatic Coach Victoria Castle's wonderful book, The Trance of Scarcity.  I believe it eloquently speaks to the power of keeping a "hopeful mindset".

Monique became a single mother when she was 19 years old. Before that she had lived in foster homes, had been treated despicably on multiple occasions, and lived at the poverty level for over three years. When I met Monique, she was refreshingly honest and insightful, able to tell her life story without bitterness. "How can you be so generous and positive, given the experiences you've had?" I asked. She smiled. "My history doesn't define me. I get to do that. And I know that my son and I will have a wonderful life". 

In just a few short years, I watched Monique go from working as a waitress to attending an excellent college on scholarship; from being shy to becoming a community spokesperson for child advocacy, from being single to marrying one of the finest men I've ever had the pleasure to know. 

Was Monique worthy? Absolutely. Did she want what she got? You bet she did. But what made her irresistible to her desire was her steady confidence. She did not leave the welcome mat out for worry and doubt. She rested in a sense of assurance. In this way, Monique came into relationship with the life she was attracting long before all the details of her life matched up with her vision. 

A great finder of bargains, Monique knew how to shop at garage sales and thrift stores. Her wardrobe was campy and innovative; I marveled at the creative way she put things together. After a Saturday excursion to her neighbourhood flea market, Monique called with excitement about an old fashioned trunk she had found. "My future husband will love this! He must be getting close," she chirped. 

The trunk was indeed amazing. Sturdy, ornate, and loaded with charm, Monique's find stood nearly four feet tall. She now had a place to put all the things she had lovingly collected over the years for the man she knew she was going to marry. 

Monique began taking great pleasure in her anticipation of her husband's arrival. It was like watching someone who's preparing to take a long trip - they get immersed in maps and guidebooks, imaging what they'll be doing. There's no anxiety to stifle their confidence, they start enjoying the journey before they've even packed their bags. It's the opposite of my attitude in high school when I was pining near the phone, praying for that young man to call me. I wasn't confident, so I hovered and fretted and wadded my energy into a knot. 

On Monique's wedding day (she met her husband a few months after her flea market find heralded his imminent arrival), she presented the groom with the trunk, now loaded with gifts, and spoke of the way she had been preparing for him to show up ."I knew you were coming," she said, "so I've been collecting things to give you. This is my dowry to you, my belief in us." Remembering her words still gives me shivers.

For anyone who is looking to enjoy more peace, joy and abundance in your life, I can strongly recommend Victoria's book.  She is a gifted writer, coach, and teacher. You can buy Victoria's book directly from her site.

2) Marketing - Assumptions, Growth and Accountability.

Albert Einstein once said that our "problems cannot be solved by the same level of thinking with which we created them."  This succinct bit of wisdom captures one of the biggest problems we independent professionals encounter in trying to build our practices.

As humans, we do not so much deal with reality, as we deal with our interpretation of reality. In fact we are very adept assumption making machines. 

We make assumptions about ourselves: How good a coach we are, what we are capable of doing, what is possible for us in our lives, what we deserve, etc. 

We also make assumptions about our market: Who we are best suited to coach, what their needs are, what they can pay, how we stack up to the competition, etc. 

Once we have our assumptions, we act on them and they become our reality. Moving beyond our current level of success always involves moving past the limits of our current assumptions. 

Because we do so much on our own, independent professionals really benefit from having structures in our life to help us identify and move past our assumptions. With a support team, we can routinely check in on our reality, what is working, what is not working, what lessons we can learn from our struggles, and what we are going to do differently next week.

Without a support team, we can stay hamstrung by our limiting assumptions for months and years.

To grow your business optimally, you need to continue to grow yourself. To grow yourself optimally you need to be in relationship with others who can raise your awareness and hold you accountable to make better choices and take action. 

There's a lot of research that confirms that given the choice, we humans will usually default to take the easier path of staying with our current assumptions. 

Whether your support coming in the form of a coach, a friend, a colleague or a mastermind group, you will really benefit from ongoing relationships that provide the support and accountability to help you walk the more gratifying path of fuller learning, engagement and expression.

"Problems cannot be solved by the same level of thinking with which we created them."

- Albert Einstein

3) Coaching - The Call for A Science Based Coaching Model.

In last month's newsletter I shared my belief for coaching to have greater credibility, understanding and impact in the world, it would greatly benefit from growing itself on the back of solid evidence-based research.  I specifically suggested that we employ some of the recent and extraordinary findings in Emotional Intelligence, Positive Psychology and brain research to create a science based coaching model. My suggestions were posted on a blog at for all to comment on.

Findings: My observations to date is that this is not a topic that excites and engages many coaches. (I guess this is to be expected because most coaches are too busy coaching and building their business.)  

Nevertheless, I will continue to study, confer with colleagues and researchers, and develop my thoughts on this topic. (I have learned many times that not everything that is important is popular and interesting.)  

4) Business Development - What's limiting you in your practice?




This program was designed to provide affordable and convenient mentoring for coaches who have been in business a few years and find themselves plateaued out making between 30 and 70K.

It is focused on providing the support, information and accountability to help them to a much more enjoyable and rewarding place in their business and life.

The program combines a monthly 1 to 1 call with me, a monthly group call, and weekly accountability calls with a small group.  (The January and February 6-Figure Practice Mentoring Program filled quickly. Everyone has enjoyed the deeper work this program allows.) 

You can read all about the program at: 

We have the last group this Spring starting May 9th.  If you want to join us, drop me a note.



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Life Coach and Business Development Specialist Steve Mitten B.ApSc, CPCC, MCC helps individuals, professionals and leaders find their niche, be their best and make an impact.

Visit Steve at


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